HI! I’M ALEXA.
A certified Mind-Body Practitioner, Somatic Sex Coach & Writer . I help women come back home to their bodies, pleasure and orgasmic aliveness.
I nerd out on human potential. Feel fiercely about human rights. Am obsessed with how our body’s work. And believe that a life filled with intimacy, pleasure and erotic aliveness is available to all.
But it wasn’t always this way…
Sex always fascinated me.
From a young age I remember being so deeply curious.
I hungered to experience sex. To feel that mind-blowing pleasure. To know that toe tingling, out-of-this-world ecstasy that film & TV promised me. And yet every time I’d have sex, I’d feel numb. I’d freeze up. And I’d shut down.
My partner’s touch felt like nothing. Clitoral stokes kind of hurt. And penetration was just sort of there.
I felt so much shame. I thought that everyone else were having all these wild, orgasmic adventures and I became terrified that maybe something was wrong with me.
This fear was so big. And the shame was so heavy. That I did the only thing I knew how…
I performed.
I made the “right” sounds. Moved my body in the “right” way. And faked every orgasm with my partners. All the while trying to avoid the empty hollow feeling gnawing away at me.
But the more I performed, the more numb I became. And the more scared I got that something might be broken with me.
(side note: this is never the case!).
Over time, the weight of my shame became too much. Too heavy. Too painful that another voice began to say: “there’s got to be another way!”
So I did a deep dive into Dr Google. And what I found left me feeling...
Deflated. Disheartened. And scared!
I heard “some women just can’t orgasm” so many times I wanted to scream. (I think I did). I read articles that were written by experts that still viewed sex so deeply through the lens of male pleasure that it infuriated me. And I digested resources that told me to just “buy some lube and grab a vibrator”.
None of it worked.
None seemed to speak to the emotional pain and numbness I was feeling.
And none of it made me feel like sexual pleasure and orgasm would ever be possible.
But here’s the thing. I’m a little bit stubborn. And I hate it when people tell me I can’t do something. Where there’s a will, there’s a way. And I was determined to find that freaken way.
So I started to explore my sexuality holistically. Somatically. Compassionately. I asked myself “What if this numbness is my body’s way of protecting itself? And if my body learned to hold this numbness from somewhere, couldn’t it also learn to let it go?”
What I uncovered body blew my mind. Literally ;)
No part of you is bad, broken or made wrong.
Every part of you makes sense.
I became obsessed with learning how the body holds onto unprocessed emotions.
How trauma is defined in regard to our nervous systems. How polyvagal theory relates to our sexuality. How breathwork can be used as a tool to access deeper layers of our body’s consciousness. How we can release deeply stored, decade long tension. How turn on and desire is expressed differently in all of us.
I entered in neo-tantric trainings. Sexuality certifications. Trauma educations. And I gave myself the the kind of Sex-Ed my teenage self hungered for!
And with a lot of patience, a lot of showing up for myself, and oh so much compassion for my magnificent body…
I learnt how to embody deep, lasting and life altering transformation - from the inside out.
And guess what - those pleasure doors began to open!
It's not an over statement to say that this work has complete changed my life - not just in my sexuality - but in everything!
I’m more compassionate with myself and others. I speak my mind more freely, openly and honestly. I trust my needs are important and I’m able to tend to them from a place of genuine care and respect.
I champion myself. Daily!
I’ve learned to show up for myself, my body and my sexual pleasure in ways I didn’t know I wanted or needed.
And, the aliveness of pleasure that is now available throughout my entire body has on multiple occasions brought me to tears.
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VITA Coach (A tantric approach to Love, Sex & Relationships by Layla Martin - ongoing)
Integrative Somatic Trauma Therapy Certificate (The Embody Lab)
Somatic Experiencing Practitioner (SOS International - ongoing)
Mind-Body Practitioner (Mind-Body-Food Institute)
Holistic Life Coach (Mind-Body-Food Institute)
CPD in Applied Neuroscience and Brain Health (The Neuroscience Academy by Sarah McKay)
MA in Creative Business and Entrepreneurship (National Film & Television School, UK)
I now get the privilege of helping other women, who like me, desire to return back home to their bodies, pleasure and sexual aliveness. Because it really is possible.
Now, I’d love to hear from you! What brought you to my work? And in what ways can I help you reclaim the kind of sex that makes you go ‘holy-fuck-I-didn’t-know-that-was-possible’ 🤯
If you want to hear more, make sure to join The Body Collective - where I share my most exclusive and personal content, including free trainings, inspirational stories & bonus material - delivered straight to your inbox every week.
I hope my programs, resources, and free offerings help you live your most expressive, embodied and pleasure-filled life. Where you get to be unapologetically true to who you are and feel 100% alive.
Why? Because you matter.
With love ♡